A prayer for the children

Just after writing about our neighbours here, our landlord asked them to leave because the boys were naughty. They left before I even knew they were leaving. I will always wonder what will become of those two boys. I think of the times I turned them away from playing or got impatient with their fighting. Could we have done more? Shown more love in the time we had with them? My prayer is that they will find a place where they are tolerated, and ultimately, their true refuge.

What is it about children anyway, that does tug at the heart strings? Why are we so endeared to them more than any other sub-group of humanity, particularly when they are in need? I have a theory..
With children, what we do now to them, with them and for them can be so influential. We have responsibility and opportunity.
Regardless of one's view on original sin, babies begin life untainted. True, child-like innocence is theirs. As yet uncorrupted, their trust is pure. And then life begins.
As parents and carers, we have an unparelleled treasure. A life to guard. A spirit of another human being to nurture and protect. Made in the image of God and with His handwriting already on their hearts, the task is next to overwhelming. I am not up to it.
I often think of the times I have yelled at my children, smacked them in anger, or perhaps missed sharing something special with them, even dismissing it because it was more important to them than to me. More than once I have wondered at me having the 'power' in the relationship when that power is able to corrupt, and when they have so much to teach me.  When childhood has such a bearing on all of life, even in shaping a psyche the guilt of influencing that to the detriment of my own children is sometimes suffocating. For me anyway, and I expect many mums, because my love for my children is consuming, so therefore is the guilt when that love fails.

I need Your power each minute to keep me from impatience, anger, pride, self-righteousness, inattentiveness.

I need Your Spirit to teach me to slow down and enjoy the moments of life.

I need you to somehow remove the unbearable guilt of failur, knowing that I can, have and will damage the most precious of souls. Oh Lord, how to let You be bigger than me??? How to let your goodness and plans for our children outweigh any harm we can bestow upon them. Children in my house and children playing across your earth. How to let your grace be sufficient - not just in the weaknesses I have, but in the weaknesses I cause. That our children may thrive because of you and despite of me.